'If you had to choose between a boyfriend and your dog what would you choose?'
'My dog... have you SEEN how cute tank is???'
Life is pretty great. Work. Mike. Sleep. Work. I'm single and fucking loving it. For the first time I love being by myself. I get to spend more time with my bro, and a girl won't yell at me.I get to check out as many girls as I want. And my phone isn't being poached by one girl. Bohme boutique is my night and day.I'm always there these days. No better way to meet girls. I'm getting paid to check out their asses in tight jeans. Goddamn. I have the life. Mike's birthday was hard though. It's hard thinking that he won't be in my life forever. But I'm not supposed to think about it. You know what else I don't think about? Fucking slut Skye. She came to my work and asked me how I was and I just said fucking fantastic. I don't even want that bitch in my life anymore. I'm fucking drake throte and I don't need a cheating whore in my life. Ten days til christmas. Remember last year how I went to mexico with my dad? Surprisingly, I'd go back and do that again. He just needed a chance. And to cool it with his girlfriend... I don't have holiday plans this year. I didn't buy anyone anything and I don't expect anything. But between you and me, I found a new pair of nikes in Mik'es closet in my exact shoe size. I'm still a sneaky son of a bitch with christmas.
Some things never change

So pretty much.. life is fucking awesome. End of story.
The end.
P.s. Ke$ha came on during work and I danced like a fool. Because of you!

somebody tell me what i need to hear to keep going.

JustFuckMyLife

God I hate this feeling. The feeling that I still need you even though I hate you. The fact that I never want to see you again, but all I want to do is text your sorry ass. Every time I close my eyes and I see you fucking him even though you said you loved me. You said you would never break my heart. I guess you didn't though, you just shredded it instead. Fuck. And it makes me hate myself even more that I still miss your lips and your touch. You didn't even try to apologize or offer an explanation. Even Mike, the kid on fucking ecstasy tried harder than you and you were fucking sober. I fucking gave you my fucking heart and loved you to no end and this is how you repay me? I don't even know if I can still be your friend. I don't know if I'll be able to look you in the eye and not see the way they were closed in passion when you were with Mike. I can't look at your hair without seeing him pulling it. I can't look at you without remembering. Remembering the times that you made me smile and gave me butterflies and were my girl. And then remembering that it was all destroyed and remembering why it was all destroyed. I don't know if I hate you as much as I hate myself. I shouldn't have trusted anyone that much. I never should have become the girlfriend having guy. I allowed myself to be cheated on. At a party. Where all of our friends witnessed our breakup. I hate that I'm so torn up about this. I should be happy that I have a chance to hit on everyone. But all I want is my girl.
I've never felt so fucking betrayed before in my life. Why did this all have to happen? You said you loved me. But did that ever even mean anything to you? Because every single fucking time I told you that I meant it from the bottom of my heart. I would give you the world and I probably still would because love can't just end the way that yours did for me.
You just ruined everything that we ever had or could have had. But I still love you.
I won't let anything hurt you, darling. I fucking hope we can still fucking remain the fucking friends that we fucking were. Fuck.
Why the hell can't I just stay on one feeling instead of jumping all around like this. I just want to feel hate and the need for revenge. Not hate to myself and still love for her. Jesus.
I need someone right now.

Fuck this shit. I'm so over this fucking town. Fucking slut that fucks everyone and their mom. I should have seen it coming. Why the fuckkkk
I need to get out there.

The pictures that adri takes to make fun of me...
Summer is amazing :)

whatever uyou want :)

Dear Felicity,
you just went to sleep and now I'm devoting some time to you to write this post. Just for you!
I know you were just telling me about things in England, but I seriously do hope that everything is going good :) because that's exactly what you deserve :) You're amazing, but I don't think you really know that. And I don't think you know how much impact you have on people's lives. You've helped me through a lot of things. You help me every time you talk to me, and even when you don't. I think about you a lot. And I bet that sounds pretty creepy, but it's just because you give me inspiration. You shine. And you shine great distances. You live in England and you somehow managed to help someone clear the fuck over in Utah. That's a talent, I think! Ask around, you help people. Message Adri as soon as you read this and I bet she would say some things along the same lines. We love you, Felicity. And we only want the best for you :)
Anyways, here in Utah... crazy shit. Dixon almost died, I don't know if you knew about that. But Terance like donated part of his liver to him and saved his life. And he just came home from california and is going to stay the summer. Keep it quiet, but we all cried when he was finally here. Me and Skye have broken up three times since I talked to you last I think. One time because I was too 'preoccupied with someone else' the second because I wasn't sure about the relationship and the third because she wasn't sure about love and sex but we're good now. I don't know if it will last through the summer though. But I think I'm ok with that. Some relationships just have an expiration date I think. I would do it all over again though. I think it was worth it. I can't remember ever talking about prom, but it was amazing :) her dress was perfect and her hair was just the way I like it. Her hair is my favorite part about her. I can't even explain it. My friend won prom king by a landslide and I was nominated, but my grades were to sucky for me to be in it :) Track was legendary! I did pretty good and beat my time from last year. It's all in preparation for rugby :) I wanted to do soccer again, but it would have been way to busy for that. I got a job at a pawn shop and its pretty much the coolest thing I've ever done. You see some of the weirdest people bring stuff in and you can tell they are just selling it for their drugs :) One person tried to sale a shoelace :) it was awesome. I used to work at a place called urban decay, but I had to quit. It was just a small little boutique for like designer shit, but I could feel myself becoming more of a cunt every day so I was just like peace. I failed a semester of english, but I convinced my teacher to pass me so I stay on track :) I'm just good at persuasion words I guess :)
I'm pretty sure that's the only thing that has happened in like five months or whatever :)

Yes I am well aware that it has been over a month, but back down bitch.
I'm alive and that's all you need to know.

begging you please

Adri: you're honestly one of the most amazing friends that I have. You're always thinking of everyone except yourself and that's really valuable in my eyes. I know you keep getting dumped and dropped off by your 'best friends' but I'll stay here for you. I'm begging you please, just stay optimistic. You're a princess and soon you're going to find someone that's good enough for you and they're going to become your fairy tale.
Skye: thank you. i love you.
Mike: bro. It's all going to be chill soon. The year is going to end any day now and then its summer and it will all arrange its self. Run it out.
Terance: you let a really good thing go. Nice cheap replacement, but I like the original better.
Dixon: dude, you've got this. You're so fucking close it's ridic. Be healthy, stay sober, stay clean. Don't take it for granted that you almost died but was lucky enough to have such a good friend. If I were you that alone would make me start believing in god...
Felicity: I miss you. I hope everything is going alright. We need to have a GOOD talk soon because I have so much to thank you for. You're unbelievable.

Happiness in the small things.

Maybe deep down we're all addicts.
We all have something.
That one little weakness that makes you keep going back.
And maybe you're just mine...

Everything will work out. In my favor.

The above statement is true. I swear to god it is.

Oh and adri is a stripping WHORE ;)

I need to go get my fucking girl back.
Sorry I ditched, Adri...

So maybe I did give a fuck. This kills. I just want to go back to the days when nothing was more perfect than the way our hands fit together. When snowflakes would stick to her eyelashes as she danced around. I just want to go back to when we loved each other more than we hated.
So just go ahead and do whatever you want because maybe I don't give a fuck. Chop all your fucking hair off and throw it away. Stop dance classes. Wear more makeup. Just change everything that I loved about you, because I don't anymore. I regret every fucking thing we did. I wish I could fucking go back in time and never have sex with you because you're just a cunt and you don't deserve me. I wish I never would have stood up for you that day, I wish I never would have helped you make friends, and I especially wish I never would have took your hand or met your lips with mine. I fucking hate you Skye and I swear to god I'll make sure everyone else does too. You were a shitty girlfriend, but I was a shittier boyfriend because guess what: I was in love with someone else the whole time.
I didn't mean any of that. I just want you back in my arms. That's where you belong. Don't change. I don't regret anything. I've never loved anyone but you. I've never fucking loved anyone but you, Skye. I fucking love you, but you were killing me. How can the only thing thats killing me make me feel so alive? I think I'm just an addict. So maybe you need to go. But come back.
I'm so confused. All I know is that I want you. I'm going to get us back. This wasn't a breakup, you mark my words.
I just fucking love you. And love IS enough sweetie...

Let the shit begin...

All hell is about to break loose.
But I don't give a fuck- I I don't give a fuck,

Prom was great :)
We haven't had a night like that in a long time. And I wish it was always like that. Because when you are that's when I love you the most. You're hair looked great and you were seriously the most beautiful girl in the room. I love that everyone tried too hard with their hair all done up and yours was just down in it's waves. You know your hair is my favorite thing. Because it's so long and the waves are what every girl wants. It's pretty much perfect. And I can't even tell you about what it feels like when I have my nose buried in it.
I don't want to end this. But I think I have to.

Today I talked to someone that I haven't talked to in the longest time.
And it took me right back. And i just felt some peace. Because I swear to god that was exactly what I needed right now.
So thanks love, I really missed you too.

How come we don't say I love you enough?

I've never been in the hospital before. Not that I remember. I mean I know I've gotten broken bones and stitches and stuff, but it never seems as dramatic as everyone else's story. So it doesn't really count. Even when I have gone in, I've always known that I'll be safe. That was never a question. If it was, I don't know what I would even do. Or who I would think about. Or what I guess. This last week I've just been thinking about that a lot as one by one my friends get admitted to the hospital. What if I'm next? And I'm not ready? What if I haven't done all my homework or said I love you to everyone? Then what happens, I just regret it the whole time?
I'm afraid of not being here anymore. I'm afraid of dying.

I JUST WANT TO GRADUATE! NOW!
God I fucking hate school

I had an epiphany today and I'm glad I did. it's gonna be a good week.
Need to get a tux for prom aystat.
What does the color Skye blue even mean? She's going to look gorgeous that night.
Baby, please just wear your hair wavy. And don't cut it. I like how long its getting. I like everything about you. We'll have an amazing night, I swear to god we will.
Sorry I suck at blogging now, but life is boring.
Homework. Skye. Practice. Sleep. School. Homework. Skye. Practice. Sleep. School...

Today was a much better day :) Skye, Mike, and Adri tag teamed me and I couldn't stop smiling the whole day. It was nice. I'm done stressin about things that don't mean shit. It's all about the good now. And time to start planning for prom :) it has to be hella good for my girl this year! I need suggestions though so text me :) Yeah that's all. I'm aware I'm shit at blogging but people keep stealing my thunder. Deal with it, whore.

Life is truly shit right now. I'm not getting along with anyone. Not even the people I love most because I'm taking all my anger out on them. I don't even know what's going on right now with myself but I need someone. I need to find myself again.
Help me.

I'm in a band, bitches

yeah I'm pretty sure that says it all!
And YES being in a band ADDS to my attractiveness because being in a band is COOL and ATTRACTIVE!
My girlfriend is a fucking retard for thinking otherwise ;) I love you, babe:)

It's almost time for prom :) I just barley asked Skye and I'm pretty stoked about it. If mike doesn't ask a girl soon i'm going to fucking blow a gasket.

This one's for you, love.

Ok, so my life. Hectic. Confusing. Full of love. And full of hurt because I don't know how to help my friends. Especially my best friend. Because a guy just ripped her heart out. And this was the worst possible time for that to happen to her. She has alot going on in her fucking life then he had to go and add this, I personally hope that he rots in hell. She is way too good for the likes of you and I hope that he is aware of that. And I hope she finds something better than him, someone that will make her happy. Because she deserves to be happy.
So many forms to fill out. So much money to find. Prom couldn't come at the worst time, but I'd rather die than make my girl miss her prom night. We're going to go and she will wear my favorite color and I'll get her her favorite flowers. Because I love her so goddamn much :) And I'm grateful to have her even if it doesn't last forever. All we had to do was stop worrying about the future and about other people's opinions. Something Adri told us all along. Adri, Skye really does love you. You put a lasting impression on her for sure even though you don't know it. And the stars in the skye really are glittering just for you so you don't have to worry about anything else in life. If you don't get asked to prom then I'll take you. Or Mike can take you or Dixon. I know a million guys that would be willing to go with you even a couple hundred girls that would be interested too. So you go out and buy a new dress because there isn't a single fucking thing that will stop you from attending your junior prom. Mike was pretty smitten with you in case you weren't aware. And notice that you weren't even wearing your hair that day! You're gorgeous either way :) it's time you see that by now.
Chocolate milk calls out my name.
I need a haircut and the only person I want to cut it hasn't taken a single lesson yet. Hurry up, Adri! And I'm so grateful you texted me last night. I think we both needed that. Never feel lonely because you always have people around you. And if you need me ever, and I mean ever, I'll drop fucking everything and stay up a long as you need me to. This is a support system so there can't be any breaking or falling. I know this wasn't even a very good post, but I hope everyone forgives me anyways. I love you :)

I know. I've been way way sucky lately. But so much has been going on. And I don't know when I'm going to find the time to do a nice full on blog. But all you need to know is: never settle for something that doesn't make you completely happy because if it doesn't now it never will. It's not worth the heartache.
I love Skye.

You're just a shitload of motherfucking laughs aren't you? Go to fucking hell.

I don't care what they say I'm in love with you

At least salt lake 'good ol' community college wants me :)
I don't care if that's all I get accepted into because then I can transfer into the u
I haven't had a nice long blog in the longest time, midterms are coming and I have a 2.7 :| If it doesn't get raised then I'm going to only be allowed to eat and shit. I won't be able to have a life at all. Midterms isn't even real so get your head out of your asses and see that. FGHJKHGFCHXDHJVFYUTDKKCGJJJJJJ SO FUCKING annoyed right now.


www.ixhopexwexcollide.blogspot.com MAKES MY LIFE!

I need to focus

I can't fail anymore :/
Suu was pursuing me because of my rugby, but then they found out I'm failing a couple.
Gotta try harder for my future

From the window... to the wall!

Dear sweethearts royalty, your rules are RETARDED.
I got the most votes. So I win. The fact that I'm failing not one but two classes is besides the point.
So just give my my fucking crown and banner.

I can feel your heart. You make mine stop and I'll make yours' start

Dear Felicity,
I really miss you.


I'm not sure if you'll even read this

Stop yerr crying. WHORE.

He is a cunt.
I told you not to go out with him.
I TOLD YOU.
But I'll still pick you up, dust off the dirt, dry your tears, and fuck him up.
Love, it'll all get better in time. And until then I love you to the end of the earth and back.
You're beautiful. Lets tell everyone he's gay. :)

Sex is part of nature. I go with nature.

Me and Skye are blissfully back together with no problems whatsover :)
we even talked about all the things that made us break up, AND we worked them out.
Because I was willing to work to work things out.
And I wrote her a song :) one that only she would get
but it's pretty fucking good :)
And yeah, life is just pretty great right now.
I need to learn to be a better blogger though :/

You make it hard for breathing

"So I have a boyfriend"
-Errrmmm. Excuse me? Who?
"Well... Shane."
-No. I don't approve. His name has never been muttered before. It's too soon. Nope. No way. Break up. Now please. Three way call him. I'll be quiet and just listen. I don't like him at all. Shane?
"So you and Skye?"
-Dooon't change the subject. But yeah, we're together now.
"Oh wow how'd that happen"
-Well we went to lunch and. Oh my god break the fuck up with him already. Stop distracting me. God.

?

Why is every fucking person in Utah sick today?
Can I just have another popsicle and a cute text from Skye?
Give me a fucking asprin.
More two ply tissues please.
Where are my warm socks???
What do I even have?
WHAT THE HELL.

Love.

Me and Skye :)

Oh some people's whores...

So I guess there was protection involved because I was finally man enough to talk to her. She said there was a condom and she's on birth control and she did that plan b thing or whatever. So chances are like .0001% but then we started talking about how it all went down. And she admitted that she completely used me because she knew I was that drunk. I thought it was mature of her to tell me that so I told her that I don't blame her for anything or hold her at fault. Because I don't anymore. And I could see in her eyes that she was sorry. So I forgave her. But I don't even know if I had anything to forgive her for. It takes two. I shouldn't have been drunk.

But we're still going to be friends. She's a really nice girl.

Skye. Love. Thank you for helping me get through this and be strong. I don't know what the hell I would be without you. You're so much more than just what you think you are to me. Not only am I in love with you completely, but you're also my best friend. I can't live without you and I don't know how I did for so long. You're the girl who taught me the meaning of love and the one I'll never fucking forget. You can count on that. You're the one that I've always been looking for. The one that has never been a joke. You're the one I always fall asleep thinking about. I love you more than you can fucking imagine. I love you more than there are grains of sand in this world. You're my everything. You're my heart, sunshine, and Skye.

Can I have photograph to show my friends that angels truly exist?

When Dixon came to visit...

I don't know how the brotha does it...

Make the same mistake twice

Me and Skye are really good friends again. I told her everything that happened. And I cried because I'm a fucking pussy. But she cried too. Because she cared. I already feel like a part of me is restored. I'm feeling positive. Especially because I know she'll help me pull through.

But I don't remember if we used protection or not because I was so drunk. This month is going to be hell. If she's pregnant is it my responsibility to stay with her even though I didn't do anything? It was not my choice. Would she keep it? Abortion? Would her parents make us get married?

This is why I'm lucky to have Skye. She helps me forget when I don't want to remember.

Peace.

It's the way that you hold my hand in the car

It's been a great day. That's almost everything that I have to say. Except I'm so fucking pro at emailing! I got five of my teachers to give me and A just because I pleaded for one :) I cheer for technology. It can take over the world and I won't give a flying fuck because now I have a 4.0 again. I feel invincible.

Lunch with Skye tomorrow :)

Why do I even try?

End of term.

Grades are shit. And now they can't go up.

I miss have order in my life.

And having someone that directs me to do

the right thing. Because I don't know how on my own.

I'm so fucking tired of girls taking advantage of me.

And I don't even know why they do.

But I swear, to the fucking lord himself,

I have a good personality. I'm more than

the pickup lines I use. Get to fucking know me.

Oh yeah...

I also failed my english exam. And that used to be my best subject.

I make stupid mistakes.

Sweetie lovey bear... sugar plum... pumpkin pie... my sexual unicorn

Skye didn't find out I don't think, but I'm still incredibly embarrassed to look her in the eye. Braxton wants to hang out with me like twenty four seven and I have to remind her almost every five minutes that I'm really just not that into her. Why doesn't she understand that what we did just made her more unattractive to me? She seriously disgusts me. And I disgust myself even more. My wang has been way too many places. I used to be at least pretty clean, but now I'm just a standardless motherfucker slut. I can not stand the way that I acted on Saturday. I shouldn't have trusted myself to get drunk and I shouldn't have been grinding all over the place.

Why did I let that happen to myself :/

I wouldn't mind just dying right about now.

And I beheld a liar.

I'm a motherfucking whore. Or maybe it's her that's the whore.

But either way it happened. And I feel so fucking weird about it because I didn't want to do anything like this again. We aren't together. I don't WANT to be together and I don't really even like her. I don't know what my fucking problem is. We were just grinding. But then she was kissing me and I was drunk so I didn't stop. And then she was on top of me and we were naked. I don't remember anything in between those two things. She took advantage of ME. I'm the victim! She was the one that was motherfucking sober. I can not be held accountable for my actions when I'm drunk.

But I know I still have to be. This pisses me off because I didn't want to be that guy anymore. I was changing and I was doing good. I was starting to get respect from girls other than the ones that just wanted some ass. But now I failed. I know she's going to tell everyone if she hasn't already. And then I'm back to square one all over again. I don't want Skye to know. I don't want her to lose her respect for me.

I'm going to stop drinking.

Shit dude you were fucking right. When aren't I fucking right?

Today I got asked to Jimmies today. Even though it was a guys choice dance I still got asked. Her name is Braxton and she's pretty damn cute. We talked at lunch and she told me that she had "just been waiting for me to be single so she could nab me" she told me there were girls that were just waiting for me to no longer be Skye's man and then it was like a race and she had won. I don't know what I did to deserve all this love from girls but I still love it :) Braxton told me that I could get any girl I wanted. I don't know why she thinks that and why I've been told that before. I'm really not that special. I'm not extremely good looking not to mention that I'm also too short, I have really bad language, think dirty thoughts constantly, and have extremely high expectations. I'm probably a bit of a dick. So why can I get any girl I want then? Like what the fucking hell?

But anyways I'm really excited for this dance it's going to be the fucking sex. Neon colors. Strobe lights. A girl that is just slutty enough. Grinding will be permitted. And I'll probably be able to find some drugs (that I won't do of course ;)

But I don't think that I'll have anything with Braxton after this. I still need some time just by my lonesome. I don't want to be smothered for a while. I'll just go on dates every once in a while. I'll take a break from all the late night texting or basically texting in general. I'll give my tongue and lips a little time off and just take this time to find myself. Because I'm not really sure that I know who that is. But when I find him I hope I love him.

Thank you. For everything. But especially for the strength that I borrowed and the light you shone on me.

Let me be the one who calls you baby all the time

So I forgot to talk about yesterday. I apologize.

So the day after I broke up with Skye she didn't even come to school. I know she wasn't sick. She was just sluffing. And I don't know why but that really did make me sad that she was so heartbroken that she couldn't even face me or even come to school. Her friends were giving me dirty looks all day and her old friend Blake came and threw his fucking mountain dew on me. I got FUCKING pissed off. Like are you fucking kidding me? I'm Drake Throte. Do you seriously think you can do that to me? So later I shoved him in a garbage can and poured my jamba juice all over his fucking way-too-gelled hair. Then a few other people spit on him. He can rot in hell :) Do not mess with me. I don't know what she said to them to make it sound so bad. It wasn't that bad. I'm pretty sure she was ASKING me to break up with her. And I think that we'll both be happy through this split. And maybe we'll be able to be friends again and figure out our problems. I hope so. But I swear to god I wasn't mean when I broke up with her. I didn't make her cry more than what she already would have. It was a break up of course she'll cry don't get mad at me because I did what I had to do.

But anyways. I saw her today for the first time. Since. Well. You know. But it crushed my insides. When I saw her I still expected her to come and jump on me and spin. I still expected that my lips would be able to touch hers. But we both know that can't be. I think she was thinking the same things though because she smiled at me really happy then she turned all sad. But she kept my gaze and I like like that she didn't avoid eye contact. It was a little awkward, but after that she continued to give me little sad smiles throughout the day. I miss her alot. And what we used to be. I really know we had something special. I'll never forget that.

I'll never forget.

R.I.P Skye

That was my girl. Key word being was. We broke up yesterday. It was a pretty bad break up. She cried and told me she didn't mean any of the stuff she had said about me being too flirty and I had interpreted her words wrong. When she said she wasn't good enough for me she really meant it that way not the way that I had taken it. Supposedly. But that doesn't change the fact that she talked shit on me to her friends. And I've never talked shit on her until the last couple of days AFTER finding out that she was talking shit on me. I'll never get over the fact that she was beautiful. And that I took that picture. And that it was the best one ever taken of her. She begged me to not to do what I was doing and that she would change for me. But if she had to CHANGE herself and just the fact that she considered changing herself for a fucking highschool boyfriend was a huge turnoff for me. The hardest part was just seeing the tears falling from her eyes and rolling down her cheeks ending by rolling on the lips I had just touched with mine the day before. I think she was the first girl I ever loved.

She kept reminding me about all the good times we had. The snow angels. Our first dance. Our first kiss. Our first date. Walking her to class. The deep conversations we had at night. The texts saved on her phone. The texts she had sent to me. The time we both dressed up to go to school. When we had to pick Mike up when he was drunk. When I wiped her tears away. When she helped me pass Latin roots. When she saw me cry. And then. Our last kiss.

I just let her know that it wasn't working. She just stood there still holding my hand. Then the few soft tears and she asked how long I had been planning that and what she had done wrong. I told her the truth and she started crying harder. And it made my heart break. Even more than it already was. It was the hardest thing to pull my hand away when it was obvious she was at her lowest of lows.

And I still feel like shit that I was an asshole enough to pull my hand away and to walk away while the tears were still falling. I think she was the first girl I loved. Her name was Skye and I'll never forget.

Hey babygirl whats your name Imma buy you a drank

I won't be able to sleep tonight.

Anxiety. Nerves.

What do I do when I see her? Am I supposed to act normal even though I'm planning on doing something. Something that I may or may not regret.

Why the fuck can't I just know exactly what would happen either way.

I think I'm making the wrong decision?

But what if I don't and then THAT is the wrong decision?

Pros:

Someone could just be waiting for me to be single.

I do like being single.

Hookups welcome.

Uncommitted sex.

I won't be late to class anymore.

Mike problems-resolved.

It may be what she wants.

Party Party Party Party

Fave music back in.

Cons:

Whoever is waiting could be ugly.

I like relationships.

Hookups are fairly overrated.

I like saying "I love you" after sex

I just like saying "I love you" and meaning it

I would be on time to class.

Skye problems- Unresolved

It may not be what she wants.

Kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss

I would have to take her CD out and give it back to her.

GOD I JUST DON'T FUCKING KNOW.

So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love

New years was great.

I didn't cheat. Not even tempted. Well. A little. But they were too far away anyways.

I didn't get a new years kiss. But I did later that afternoon. It was pretty sick. But things aren't the way that they used to be. And I know I have to do something about it. But I'm really scared too. And the advice didn't help. I'm left wondering now.

Constant fucking wonder. And it makes me stressed. And I don't want to go to school tomorrow feeling the way that I feel right now. Or her going the way that she feels now. I don't think that this is right anymore. It used to be though. It was wonderful and it still might be. it could get better. Fate... give me a sign. I could really use one right about now.

Hey. Sweetie. I don't know if you'll ever see this but if you do I want you to know that I want this to work. I'm trying. I only have eyes for you. And I'm trying to be good enough for you if you ever implied that. I love you, girl. You're my heart. Well, you have my heart at least. You had me at hello.